I Didn’t Sign Up for This: What to Do When Your World Upends Without Your Consent

The Moment Everything Changes

One day, you thought you knew the story. You were marching toward a future you wanted. One you felt excited about.

The next? Everything shattered.

Betrayal doesn’t come with a warning. There’s no heads-up. No time to prepare. It arrives suddenly. An unexpected rupture that rewrites your life in an instant.

And the worst part?

You didn’t choose it.You didn’t agree to it.You didn’t sign up for this.

Betrayal without consent is more than heartbreak.It’s destabilizing. It’s disorienting. And let’s just say it: It’s rage.White-hot, molten, shaking-your-fists-at-the-sky rage.

It makes you question everything: your relationship, your past, your future, and even your own intuition.

If you're here reading this, know that I see you.And I want to offer you something more than comfort. I want to give you language for what you're feeling, and a path to begin again.

Where Did My Choice Go?

There’s that old saying that begins, “When life gives you lemons…” but let’s be honest: betrayal isn’t lemonade material. It’s life-altering. The heartbreak you’re feeling? You didn’t choose it. The mistrust, the chaos, the unraveling of your confidence and your plans for the future? You didn’t ask for any of it.

And being in a place you didn’t choose is not only disorienting, it’s deeply unfair. It can be terrifying to be in a place you didn’t choose.

But here’s the truth:

When you’re caught in a reality you didn’t create, the most powerful thing you can do is begin to choose again.

Start Small: Reclaim Your Right to Choose

I know what you’re thinking.You want to yell at me and say, “Rebecca, everything is so chaotic. Everything is scary. How can I possibly make a choice?”

I hear you. And I’m not asking you to make big, life-altering decisions today. (If you need a little help choosing your first steps, my free guide Calm in the Storm can walk you through it.)

But even in the midst of upheaval, you can still choose small things that matter.In fact, those small things?

They’re everything.

• Choosing to take a five-minute walk

• Choosing to make tea and sit in silence

• Choosing to breathe

These tiny acts of intention re-anchor you in your own life.They put you back in the driver’s seat.They create a sense of steadiness and remind you that you do have agency. Even here.

There is peace, power, and calm in choice.It’s how we begin to rebuild.It’s how we start breathing again.

So What Now?

You didn’t ask for this.And yet, here you are.

Not only did someone else make a choice that upended your world, but now you’re the one left standing in the wreckage.

You didn’t raise your hand for life upheaval.And if you’re angry about that? You’re allowed to be.

If there was ever a scenario for rage, my friend, you are in it.

But here’s the thing:

You can’t live in the anger. It’s too heavy to carry.And while this radical change wasn’t your choice, you can choose what happens next.

So, here’s one powerful step to take today.

Name the Good

I know it sounds too simple. But I promise you, it works.

Take two minutes (set a timer) and name what’s good right now.Anything counts:

• You hit green lights all the way to work

• Your child smiled at you

• The sky looked like a painting this morning

The act of naming the good interrupts the cycle of anger.It reminds you that your life is more than the pain, more than the chaos, and most importantly—more than the anger.

It creates space for awareness, presence, and breath.It signals to your nervous system that you’re safe enough to notice beauty again.

And that’s no small thing.

The Good News? You Still Hold the Pen

You didn’t sign up for this chapter of your story—but you do get to write the next one.

Despite how things feel, no one can take away your power to choose what happens next.

Your power is still within you.And it’s waiting to be accessed.

Try These Three Affirmations to Begin Reclaiming Your Power

• I give myself permission to feel my power

• I easily connect to the power within me

• I feel my power, and I am safe

Let those words become your foundation.Return to them as often as you need.

Healing Starts with Small, Steady Choices

When your world turns upside down, healing doesn’t begin with grand, sweeping transformation.

It begins with bite-sized intentions.Small, grounding actions that help you feel just a little more like yourself.

These aren’t insignificant.They are life rafts.

So, name the good.

Repeat your affirmations.Take your five-minute walk.

And watch what begins to shift.

T

his isn’t about rushing.This isn’t about fixing.This is about reclaiming your agency—bit by bit, breath by breath.

There’s no finish line for you to cross.Only a steady, soulful return to self.

✨ Your Next Step: Download Calm in the Storm

If your world has recently turned upside down, know that you don’t have to rebuild alone.

My free guide, Calm in the Storm, offers tools to help you feel steady, grounded, and supported as you begin to heal—at your pace, on your terms.

👉 Download your free workbook now

Because even when everything has changed, you are still here.And you are more resilient than you know.